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A First Date

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Shawn Croft
Things To Discuss On A First Date

So you finally gathered enough courage to go talk to the cute redhead who caught your eye; your friends aren't impressed just yet. You finally develop the backbone to ask her out; now your friends are impressed.

They ask where you plan to take her out, and more importantly what you're going to talk about on that all-important first date. Your knees begin to tremble uncontrollably. Fear not, read this list and you will have the girl begging for seconds.

10. Avoid her past

Generally speaking, one should never ask about past lovers on a first date. In fact, this should be avoided until she initiates the topic (if she ever does). She might have been hurt or may still be in love with her ex. You also prefer to start with a clean slate, so becoming chummy with her and comforting her about past mistakes may not be the greatest strategy on the first date. The goal is to take off her lipstick by the end of the evening, not help her wipe the tears as they smudge her mascara.

9. Got any brothers or sisters?

Usually a safe topic of conversation is asking about siblings (don't ask her if she's got cute sisters). Again, asking about parents could backfire if they experienced a divorce or separation, especially at a young age. But sisters and brothers usually trigger good feelings and score points for you since you're showing a caring side and an interest in her family life.

8. Traveled anywhere special?

A tricky way to spark a girl's interest is by asking about past travel destinations and where she intends on visiting in the future. The upside is that if she mentions a spot she always wanted to visit, lo and behold, here comes the knight in shining armor (that's you, boy) and offers to make her dreams come true one day by taking her there. This also provides both people with some insight about one's cultural background and their openness to new adventures.

7. Drinks anyone?

A topic of conversation, especially if the date is taking place at a restaurant or bar, is the kind of food and drinks each of you prefers. Again, not only can you gauge whether or not you share culinary preferences, but the potential topics are endless and provide you with a safe topic of conversation unless, of course, you are dating someone with an addiction to food or alcohol.

6. Any career plans?

Asking a girl about her past education and whether she intends on returning to school is admittedly a double-edged sword. She might love to go on and on about her numerous academic achievements. But she might break down and admit that her current job has absolutely nothing to do with what she studied. In either case, you are provided with a golden opportunity to reassure and encourage her with an abundance of compliments.

5. How's your job?

If you are years removed from your college years, then talking about work and career goals just might be a safer topic. Admittedly, do not let her go into the mundane details about how fed up she is with her life, which would explain why she's on her seventh margarita. But generally speaking, people like to brag about work, no matter how routine it is. It also gives you an idea regarding whether or not you are dating a future CEO or a waitress-for-life (not that there is anything wrong with that, of course).

4. Got any friends?

Ask her about her friends. Even if you do not know them, she will love to tell you about her circle of friends, how much they mean to her and where she met them (and all of the things they did together). Don't doze off though, my good man, this is when you get precious details about her. If you ever make it further than the first date, her friends are usually the best source to unearth the skeletons in her closet.

3. Free time frolicking

Does she roller blade, collect stamps, or dance? How about sports? What kind of music does she like? These are the questions you must ask to determine how much of a bond exists between the two of you. Moreover, you gain some insight to follow-up questions.

2. Weekend's peakin'

Not only do you get a clearer picture of what life with her will be like after the honeymoon, but you are also sending mixed messages, which is not entirely bad at first. Yes, mind games are childish, but keeping your cards at your chest gives you leverage. She will ask herself: "Does he want to see me on weekends?"

1. Be bold and look ahead

Now, assuming she is having a good time, is looking at you with that sparkle in her eye and her body language is positive, you can look ahead and talk about other things you could do together in the future. Admittedly, you do not want to rush too far ahead and scare her off, but if she's enjoying herself, chances are she'll be curious to see what other great adventures you have in store for her.

Shawn Croft

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