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Russian women
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I will try to describe what traditional Russian women are like. Let’s discuss what is appealing about Russian ladies.
I think there are different women everywhere in the world. Every woman has her own character, her own thoughts, beliefs, wishes, values and attitudes… Every woman wishes to be happy in life, wants to have Love, children, a lovely person near with her. I can’t answer how Russian women are different from other women in the world because I am not an expert on women from different countries. I think that some women are traditional and some are not. I’m going to speak about the traditional Russian woman… I’ll not write about Russians or their culture in general, but particularly about Russian ladies.
What are they like?
Russian women are well-educated, family-oriented, beautiful, clever. They are less concerned with material wealth and more determined to be good wives and mothers. A woman, even if she is a top lawyer or doctor, would prefer a happy and stable family life to the pursuit of her own career. They have traditional family values. They want to be married for all life. All this is true, but do not forget that there are exceptions to these general attributes of a Russian woman, so you should be very careful in your choice.
Russian women possess beauty, tenderness, and spirituality that are appreciated all over the world, but the unstable economical situation in their country doesn’t provide them confidence in their future. But it doesn’t mean that they are looking for wealth. We’d like to say that Russian women haven’t enough of an idea of what a rich life is, therefore it will be enough for them to expect for their necessary things to be provided for. The most important thing for them to see in a man and future partner is not money nor a mountain of gold, but rather a genuine, honest, and sincere man. I’ll try to give you more specific details about every point that I am going to make and will give you some examples and little stories that illustrate these points from my experience working 2 ½ years in a marriage agency in Belarus.
Here is a description of a Russian woman’s traits in more detail:
1. Russian women generally have a high level of education: In general, Russian people pay a lot of attention to their education. A high percentage of Russian people have high education. They are smart and intelligent. Among Russian women, 85 out of 100 of them will have high education (University degrees or a significant amount of University courses). If you pay attention to what kind of women advertise in Russian marriage agencies then you can see this yourself. Almost every Russian woman has high education and graduated from a college or university. They read a lot of books and pay a lot of attention to studying and receiving a good education. If you walk into the subway (metro) or any bus, trolleybus, you’ll be surprised at the number of ordinary Russian people who read books and magazines.
I finished four Education/ teaching courses in my university. When I entered the University, I was surprised that, aside for two male students, there were all girls in my University teaching class. I studied education classes, but my specialization or major was computer with foreign language. Like in America and some other parts of Western Europe, computer studies in Belarus is more common amongst men. In general, Russian men are less interested in education. I’m speaking in general and do not want to speak badly about Russian men. Most Russian men finish only technical school or colleges and for Russian women, it’s difficult to find something in common with them. I would like to also add that “college” in my country does not have the same meaning as “college” in America. As I understand now, a good college in America is almost the same as university and the terms are interchangeable. In Belarus and Russia, “college” is different than “university” in that a college is where someone goes to receive a technical or vocational trade, while “university” is what is thought of in the West as higher academic education.
Among my Russian female friends (they are a little olden then I am) some of them have even two higher education degrees. They try to receive education while they are not married because when a woman marries, it means that she spends less time on her education and more time on taking care of and building her family.
Everything that I wrote you can observe for yourself after you communicate with Russian women through their letters, and believe me, you’ll be fascinated and impressed in many of their attributes. During your communication with a Russian woman, do not be surprised that she knows about Shakespeare and different literature classics, or that foreign literature is known to her. For example, I remember this moment when I was in high school and my classmates and I studied “To be or not be” from William Shakespeare’s work. My teacher told us that whoever does not understand this section of Shakespeare’s work and whoever does not know who Shakespeare is will not have a holiday and will instead need to study during their academic holiday. If this is the case, she said, then do not expect a good mark. :)
The second thing that I want say about Russian women:
2. Russian Women are family-oriented, they are good wives and good caretakers of the family: Women in Russia can make a very good career, become a leader, get her own business and at the same time she wants to have happy and stable family life. Good stable family is their first wish and priority. In Russian society’s eyes, a Russian woman should be married with children in order to have respectable social status. Russian women try to create a comfortable home and please their husbands in every way. She doesn’t want to live her life alone (a life without a family). More than anything she wants with all her heart to be good wife for her husband and good mother for her children. Nothing is more important for her than the well-being of her family. She will be happy and successful only if everything is well and secure in her home.
Russian women believe that it is the responsibility of a woman to provide a warm and loving home, and that it is the man’s responsibility to provide for this family financially. But I want to note that she will also prefer to help her husband in building his career and will be a good friend to him and give him good advice and support. A Russian woman will be happy to provide a second income for the family. She will feel uncomfortable if her income is larger than her husband’s. She will try to help him succeed. Usually, men earn more money in the Russian family because a woman’s goal is to help children in their school, or if the child is small, she concentrates on bringing up the child and to create comfort in the family. This is what she feels is her task and duty.
If a Russian woman doesn’t have a family but she has all of her other needs taken care of, then she usually will not be happy and satisfied. This is the reason why Russian women put such greatest importance on finding a good, right partner for her family life and marriage rather than on making their own career the highest priority.
In general, Russian women are more tolerant, and grew up with this habit of being attached to family and to take care of one another. Russian families do seem to be more closely-connected and interdependent than those in the West, probably because it has been necessary for them to be. For example, I can say about my family and our family’s friends that it’s really very important when all members of family share all happy and sad moments together. If one member in the family is absent from home then no one will have supper or dinner without them except in rare situations. We gathered together in the evening around the table and discussed different events in the family and in the world. I felt that in any problem, my family will help me and will give me good advice. My parents were my best friends in my life and it was a great chance to avoid mistakes in life by listening to their experience. My mum was my best friend to whom I could tell every secret and she all the time understood me. All this helped me a lot, because I heard only positive words of support, and she tried to resolve any situation I was in with me. It didn’t matter if this circumstance was bad or good or happy.
In the family that I create with my husband, I also want have such an atmosphere. Having a close family is really a help in bringing up children and in having a good environment for the family. Of course, a lot depends on what environment and conditions people live, but I think that the parents should give a good example. I’ll put all my efforts to have the same in my family, because it’s important to know how my husband feels and what kind of problems our children will have in school. It’s so important to have communication in the family and understand what kind of mood, feelings, thoughts every member has.
Russian women still hold traditional family values where the men are the leaders of the family. If you ask any woman who should be the leader in the family, she will give you an answer similar to this one:: “I want to give this role to my husband. I do not want to be the boss in the family. I want have an equal role in my marriage, but at the same time, my husband should be a strong person who could be the main support in our family. Every person in our family should be respected and should have mutual understanding. I can happily give the leading role to my husband and at the same time, I know I’ll be respected and have mutual understanding.”
Every Russian woman wants to get married. I can tell you if you have virtual or internet dating and communication with a Russian woman, you can be fairly sure that she doesn’t play with you and doesn’t have fun with you through the Internet. This is because for a Russian woman, the internet is very expensive entertainment, and sometimes she could spend all of her earnings for month for internet and email fees at an internet café or Russian Post Office. She is looking for her second half, a partner for marriage, not just a friend and pen-pal. Some of them are tired from rudeness, disrespect, fibbing, and want to have a normal person near with them. She dreams about having a good family life and a stable relationship. In Russia, it’s difficult to find a normal man, especially after a woman turns 25 years of age, so perhaps women feel in a hurry to get married. I have a lot of friends in Belarus who were married at the age of 20 and were divorced by the age of 25 because their husbands were not responsible and committed. The main interesting things for most Russian men are fun, friends, night clubs, discos, girls for a night and so on. I’ll write more about this in another future topic.
3. Russian women are beautiful and famous for their beauty…
It’s not a secret that Russian women pay a lot of attention to their appearance. Any woman can look beautiful if she cares to. Russian women in general care about themselves even if they don’t have money. You may ask how is this possible? Yes, it is possible for Russian women. For example, she can make some clothes by her hands, she will exercise at home or outside to maintain a good physical appearance if she doesn’t have the possibility to go to a gym. She will find different cosmetic recipes to make her skin better and so on… She will do whatever she needs to in order to look beautiful.
Younger Russian women are generally slim. They try to keep a diet and do not eat a lot of food. In general, they have an active life. She is even physically active during her regular every day activities: It’s great exercise to carry all of her shopping bags by hand, because she feels that doing shopping is woman’s duty. A Russian woman will never go out without make up, because she feels that it’s the main feature of their appearance. Every woman creates her own style, even if sometimes it’s difficult because good clothes cost not a small amount of money so they make them themselves if necessary. They like and enjoy dressing stylishly. When you visit Belarus or Russia or Ukraine, you’ll be surprised at the many Russian women walk along streets. For most of these women, their appearance and how they look is very important. They try to look good not for someone else, but first of all, for herself. Only if she is satisfied with her appearance will she feel O.k. and have a good mood. You’ll be very surprised if you come to Russia, Belarus, Ukraine that you’ll see a lot of beautiful women walking on the street. Everyone has her own style and appearance. I was working in a school which is very modern and very beautiful. There were only women working there, and every woman paid attention to her appearance very much. They never came to work without make up, without perfume or not looking stylish. Personally speaking, I also like to have good clothes and perfume, and there are a lot of opportunities in America to affordably buy products so that you can look beautiful. Believe me, to be beautiful and attractive is very important for any Russian girl or woman.
4. Russian women have spiritual interests (in things other than material things).
Do not think that Russian women are interested only in your money and the material things you can offer them. Your money or material possessions (a car, a house, a yacht and so on) are not important for her. Some women will not even ask you how many cars or what kind of car you have, or how big your house is. For example, when I was preparing to move to America, I didn’t ask my fiancé what kind of condition will we have once I arrived, because for me it was most important that he loves me and that I love him. I believe that when people have feelings for each other, understanding and so on, then they will have everything that they need and can then build their life together. It is possible to buy a house and new car together, but impossible to buy the Love and health. It’s even more interesting to create and achieve goals together. I know that not every Russian woman has such beliefs, but many of them do. For example, I have one friend who has everything that one would need for a good life: a very good, cozy apartment, good education, good work, good friends and people around her. She is attractive… But, she is unhappy because she is alone. She is 33, and yet is single and can’t meet a good and right person with whom to build a family life. Now she tries to look for someone abroad.
If you offer most Russian women material wealth, then the majority of women will feel uncomfortable and will think that you are trying to buy her. For them, it is more important what kind of feelings you have towards her, and that you possess Love, respect, understanding, honesty, and so on...
Russian Women prefer to have a more spiritual life, to go out and experience cultural entertainment such as museums, galleries, parks, and concerts… They like art, are fond of visiting theatres and cinemas. They like different kinds of music, and in general, they want to share a lot spiritual things with you rather than material things. I’m speaking about the typical Russian women, because as you understand, there are also exceptions to the rules everywhere.
5. Russian women are brave.
This is true. Just imagine and think about this-- They are ready to leave their country, their relatives, friends, job, social status, language, culture and hundreds of important and tiny things that compose their world. Believe me, it’s not so easy to begin everything from “zero,” especially for a woman who is not too young. As a Western man whose wife will be immigrating to be with him, your life will not change as much-- you will have the same friends, the same work, the same conditions of living, the same country and so on… Maybe now you’ll smile and object to my remark and will tell me: “Ok, of course my Russian wife would have better conditions for living, in America or Germany, for example.” I can say to you that the majority of women would not move if they could find a normal person for family life in their own country. Most women’s intention and aim is not to move to such a country where there is a high standard of living. And she doesn’t have thoughts such as: “Ok, America is a great country. All people are rich, so I’ll also have big money with my future husband.” NO, most of them are not thinking in this way. Russian woman are willing to find a really good person, the right match for them. They are willing to move to America or Holland to be with you not because they don’t love Russia, Belarus, or Ukraine. I actually didn’t meet that many women who were all that crazy about living in America. Maybe it is because this country is very far away from home. If you think that Russian women are all looking at America and thinking: “Great! I want to live in this country only for money and good conditions for living, and it doesn’t matter who is near with me, what kind husband with me, old, poor or rich...” --then you will be mistaken.
To be honest, it was not easy to move. I can tell you about my feelings when I was going to move to America. When I met my American husband, I understood that he is really my love and the person with whom I want to be with all my life. We both have feelings for each other, which is very important for a couple. We even have everything positive in our relationship. I wanted to be with my lovely person. But even so, it was very difficult to say goodbye to my friends, my colleges, my neighbors, relatives and especially my parents. Now I communicate with them through email and by the telephone and feel O.k., but every day I still have in my memory that it was such a difficult moment in the airport for me and my parents when I was about to travel across an ocean to live in a new country.
Another question which worried me very much was about my future work and education in my new country, because I realized that this would be a completely new environment for me with a new culture, new language, traditions, rules and so on. In Belarus, I had everything: two good jobs where my colleagues respected me very much. I was working as a teacher in a school, and part time in a marriage agency. I had good education since I was studying in a very good teaching university. I had very good conditions for living and I had a lot of friends. My parents were excellent people… So, as you see, I had everything besides a normal man near with me. I made mistakes in my choices in two past relationships and I didn’t want make a big mistake in my choice of who I would spend all my life with. I don’t regret now that by moving to be with my husband I changed all my life because I’m already adjusted and feel OK. I communicate with my friends by e-mail. I also discovered that moving to a new country is a great opportunity to understand who my real best friends are. I communicate with my parents by telephone and all this really helps me in my life. I do not feel homesick at all because of activities such as working on this website and living a married life.
The most important thing is that I have really a great friend and husband in person-- in one face. He helps me very much and understands me well. I am really ready to say to him all my life “thank you that you changed my life”-- not the country, not the style of my life, but he gave me possibility to be loved and to truly love someone myself and understand the feelings of kindness that we share.
I hope that the information that I prepared for you will be useful for you, and that you’ll find the answers to your questions on our website. I really want to help every person to understand and feel what real Love means, to find a good and right person and happiness for your life.
By Lena Darvich (Usachova)
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Online dating service for international dates. Join us for free and find someone special!
new-dating.com/rus/search.php
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